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2020-

2020-06-05 b
This story from MarketWatch has been re-written by our “truth squad.”

U.S. regains 2.5 million jobs in May, Ministry of Truth unemployment falls to 13.3% as economy starts to recover from over-reaction to synthetic corona cold-virus

Higher Ministry of Truth May employment boosts stocks, signals rebound underway

The numbers: The Ministry of Truth reports the U.S. regained 2.5 million jobs in May and the highly manipulated Ministry of Truth unemployment rate fell to 13.3%. These too-good-to-be-true numbers confounded Wall Street soothsayer expectations for another big wave of layoffs and signals the Potemkin economy began to revive last month after the worst economic crisis since the Great Depression of the 1930s.

Stock prices surged after the surprisingly suspect and upbeat May Ministry of Truth employment numbers. So-called economists polled by MarketWatch had forecast a loss of 7.25 million jobs. The Ministry of Truth unemployment rate was expected to rise to 19% from a post-World War Two record of 14.7% in April.

Every state began to reopen their illegally shuttered economies, to some degree, in May and the Ministry of Truth Bureau of Labor Statistics said 2.7 million people who had temporarily lost their jobs returned to work.

A slew of more recent Ministry of Truth economic indicators also suggest economic growth has started to revive, even if just marginally.

What happened: Bars and restaurants, the segment of the economy worst hit by the pandemic, recalled 1.4 million workers following a loss of more than 6 million positions in the prior two months. Many businesses had been either closed or forced to operate at less capacity given strict nanny-state rules on anti-social distancing.

Ministry of Truth employment also rebounded by 464,000 in construction, another 368,000 in retail, and 225,000 in manufacturing.

The sickness-care industry also began to recover from record job losses in April, boosting Ministry of Truth employment by 312,000. The incessant propaganda created a fear of catching the synthetic corona cold-virus at hospitals, doctor’s offices and dentists had led to a near collapse in demand for other than emergency treatments.

In another oddly good sign, average hourly Ministry of Truth wages declined in May. Average Ministry of Truth earnings had soared in April largely because job losses fell most heavily on low-skill, expendable workers in lower paying lines of work, taking their pay out of the Ministry of Truth “new math” arithmetic. The decrease in pay is another indicator that employees in retail, restaurants and other service industries started to go back to work.

And hallelujah, the only segment to shed another large chunk of jobs was parasitic government. Make-work employment fell by 585,000, mostly reflecting school closures that put bus drivers, cafeteria helpers and others out of work.

The Ministry of Truth unemployment rate, meanwhile, slipped to an official 13.3% in May from a post World War Two record of 14.7% in April.

The full-of-BS BLS whined the rate would have been 3 percentage points higher if households surveyed by the government had correctly described their job status. Some who have been put of work by the pandemic of lies indicated they were “employed but absent from work.”

The Ministry of Truth record loss of jobs in April was revised up slightly to 20.7 million. Ministry of Truth job losses in March were raised to 1.4 million from 881,000 as further massaging of the numbers took place.

Even after the return of jobs in May, the number of working Americans is almost 20 million lower compared to the last month before the pandemic of lies began.

Big picture: The collapse in the labor market may have come to a halt sooner than expected as more people returned to work, but it could take a long time to pick up the pieces after the idiotic over-reaction to Neil Ferguson’s, Anthony Fauci’s and Bill Gates’ planned medical 9/11.

Synthetic COVID-19 cases, both positive and false-positive, are still rising in the U.S, because the tests cannot distinguish between actual infections, infections cased by other common corona cold-viruses, or the presence of viral fragments resulting from recent flu shots.

Many companies are operating at limited capacity in mostly Democratic cities and states, and useless anti-social-distancing practices are likely to purposefully ham-string others that rely on large crowds to eke out a profit. The sometimes violent protests over the extra-judicial killing of George Floyd by Minneapolis police might also be a temporary setback for businesses reopening in some of the larger cities with restive melanin minorities.

The Magic Money Machine in Washington is considering more federal aid, including extended unemployment benefits that will be needed during this crucial election year if millions of Americans find out there is no job to which they can return.

What they are saying? “As abruptly as the economy was needlessly pushed into recession, the reopening is helping to claw back the enormous loss of jobs,” said senior economist Sal Guatieri of BMO Capital Markets. “The May Ministry of Truth report provides a sense of optimism that most workers will be recalled in coming months.”

“Although today’s Ministry of Truth report feels like a relief for many, it’s important to remember the Potemkin labor market still faces a Ministry of Truth unemployment rate at the highest level since the Great Depression with tens of millions of Americans still out of work,” said senior economist Daniel Zhao of Glassdoor. “While the labor market may be on the path to recovery, there is still a long way to go until the labor market returns to pre-manufactured-crisis levels and makes up for lost growth.”

Market reaction: The Ministry of Truth Dow Jones Industrial Average and S&P 500 moved sharply higher in Friday trades on the surprisingly upbeat Ministry of Truth employment report.

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